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Dune Part 2 Review

Written By: Caleb Tiedemann (’25)

Dune Part 2 was my most anticipated movie of this year. At the moment of writing this, I have seen it three times in theaters. When it was first released I got the privilege of seeing the movie in IMAX, and I was so enthralled, that I went and saw it again the very next day.

I can confidently say that the stereotype of “sequels being worse than the originals” does not even remotely apply here. Despite my love of Dune Part 1, I can admit that it is slow and long. However, I find beauty in that. Part 2, takes what the first movie did and improves on it in every way. Is it slow? Not at all. Does it manage to find that sweet spot between world-building and action? Yes. 

The movie focuses primarily on the spiritual aspects of the Dune universe. The author of the Dune series based the spiritual elements loosely on Islam, and even though I am no Islamic scholar, from what I do know, it has a fascinating sci-fi representation. The juxtaposition of believers and non-believers in the “Lisan Al-Giab” (Messiah), creates a tense religious atmosphere among the inhabitants of Arrakis – The Fremen. As Paul becomes accustomed to the Fremen ways he is worshiped by some and scoffed at by others. 

In the first movie, I scoffed at the idea of Timothee Chalamet playing Paul, who is supposed to grow into a powerful messianic leader, but I can say that Chalamet pulls the role off beautifully, being equally emotionally resonant and powerfully dominant. Zendaya plays Chani well; a skilled and capable fighter who falls in love with Paul as he ascends. Rebecca Ferguson plays Lady Jessica wonderfully, hiding so much calculating intelligence behind her eyes as she manipulates others for her and Paul’s benefit. Javier Bardem plays Stilgar, a believer of the Fremen tribe in the Lisan Al-Giab, who comes off as an intelligent warrior, intensely spiritual man, and loyal follower, almost to the point of being funny. However, the main standout is Austin Butler’s portrayal of Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen: a devilishly psychotic Harkonnen warrior, equally thirsty for both power and blood. Butler plays the role magnificently. Every time he comes on the screen he commands it with menacing gravitas. 

Dune Part 2 is one of the most beautifully shot movies that I have seen in a long time. Cinematographer Greig Fraser captures the beauty and simplicity of the dunes. One would think it hard to capture beauty in a sandy environment but through twilight, eclipse, and natural lighting the color palette of Dune is surprisingly varied. At one point in the film, certain scenes are filmed using an infrared camera. I have never (to my knowledge) witnessed the use of one of these cameras in a film before and it crafted the scenes it was used in beautifully. The pale soft white is utilized to film a particularly brutal scene so the contrast of color and content was an odd but tasteful choice. Hans Zimmer’s score is immaculate. It captures an almost tribal feeling in its use of drums, unorthodox instruments, and sounds. Yet, at the same time, it is a beautiful composition, brimming with emotional resonance and profound meaning.

The last half hour of the movie is one of the most impressively shot, incredibly well-acted, and beautifully lit, endings. As I said, I have seen it three times and every time the ending’s technical aspects just floor me. You don’t have to love the first movie to enjoy the second. I strongly recommend the movie. One of the easiest 10/10 movies I have ever seen.

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Stories In Focus

Dr. Marcus Dean

By Abigail Bates ('26)

Dr. Marcus Dean is a professor of Global Studies, and the Director of Off-Campus Studies at Houghton University.

Before coming to Houghton, Professor Dean and his family were Wesleyan missionaries. At the time, Professor Dean pursued his Ph.D. in Intercultural Studies with the expectation that he would use it in Latin America, however he decided to teach college courses instead.

Growing up in the Wesleyan Church, Professor Dean had always known about Houghton, but it wasn’t until his hunt for a teaching position that he became involved in the community. In 2003, Professor Dean joined Houghton’s faculty.

“At first I taught Spanish and worked with Off-Campus studies,” Professor Dean stated, “but soon moved more into the classes I am teaching now, in the areas of Intercultural Studies and Missions.”

Off-Campus Studies Assistant, Karen Hotchkiss first met Professor Dean just before she interviewed for the assistant position.

“He has worked tirelessly to make sure there are study abroad opportunities for our students,” Hotchkiss said. “He’s very knowledgeable and works with students to make sure they find a good fit for their passions.”

Professor Peter Meilaender—the Dean of Religion, Humanities and Global Studies, and a professor of Political Science—has worked together with Professor Dean for a long time, in a number of contexts: in the Off-Campus Studies office when taking students abroad, reviewing International Development majors’ senior capstone projects (along with Dr. Oakerson) and developing the new Global Studies major.

“His background in missions gives him a perspective that most of us lack in trying to understand different cultures,” Professor Meilaender remarked, “and many Houghton students have benefited from his experience over the years.”

Professor Meilaender commented that Professor Dean has worked hard to give students opportunities to travel and engage in other cultures, even as enrollment in the program dropped over the past few decades.

“But Dr. Dean,” Professor Meilaender said, “despite these challenges, has remained committed to helping students understand, engage, and travel the world.”

In both the last academic year (2022-2023) and this current year (2023-2024), Professor Dean has worked tirelessly, helping students complete their requirements in the discontinued Intercultural Studies and International Development majors.

“Dr. Dean puts in long hours on behalf of his students,” Professor Meilaender added. “He is in his office more than most faculty and is always available to students.”

Professor Dean has always enjoyed teaching, especially in the work he does to inform students about different cultures. He hopes that by sharing his experiences of living in other parts of the world, his students will be able to meaningfully interact with our increasingly diverse world and touch the lives of people facing cultural differences. To make choices, thinking, “How can we be like Christ?”

“It is interesting that we really don’t know how what we do will [eventually] end up,” Professor Dean contemplated. “My first year here, I had a student in class [Dr. Klejment-Lavin, who] has been on the mission field, now has his doctorate, is a college professor, and will be the speaker Monday April 22nd for the Chamberlain Missions Lecture … teaching really is about the long term, but today matters so that students engage for the long term.”

In his years of teaching, Professor Dean has learned alongside students in order to continue connecting with them. He enjoys exploring new topics and areas students are interested in, and applying that knowledge in future conversations.

Julia Collins (‘26) describes Professor Dean as a good professor who has a lot of knowledge in addition to personal experience.

“The most important thing I’ve learned from him,” Collins said, “is that Christians need to be tolerant towards other cultures. It is important to treat everyone with love and respect.”

Professor Dean’s classes have been described by students as informative, interesting, organized, and students know what to expect from him.

 “His teaching style is organized and foreseeable,” Chesnie Waddingham (‘26) said. “He follows a set schedule when assignments are due … I like it because it’s nice to know what to expect, and I can trust nothing is going to sneak up on me to do [later]. I think he does it this way for the benefit of the students. It prevents a lot of stress for us.”

Waddingham described Professor Dean’s lectures as being calm and incorporating group discussion and interactions about one to two times a class.

“I love Marcus Dean,” Waddingham declared. “He is very approachable, and cares deeply for his students and what he is teaching us. I appreciate [his] comforting classroom atmosphere, and I know that his office door is always open if I need anything.”

Waddingham explained that one of the biggest things she’s learned from Professor Dean is the practice of considering her assumptions and beliefs about the world, while aligning her reflections with scripture.

“He encourages all of us to see the world through the lens of the Bible, and it’s a beautiful and powerful thing,” Waddingham reflected.

Looking towards the future, Professor Dean said, “We always look forward to understanding what God has next. Before we came here, we had no idea what would be next. Yet I am now finishing my 21st year at Houghton! I need to remind myself that I can look forward to what God will do.” ★

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Stories In Focus

Rachel Wells

By Anna Catherman ('24)

Senior Rachel Wells took Transitions this Fall 2023 semester. 

Wells came to Houghton from New York City, where she’d attended The King’s College for two years. When King’s shuddered due to financial woes, Houghton offered a generous teach out program, making it a clear choice. But it still wasn’t easy for Wells to start over in a new place for the second time in three years.

Wells grew up in suburban Florida—vastly different from both New York City and Houghton. 

She didn’t tour King’s, and had only spent half a day in New York City before moving there.

Wells said that her new life “did not feel real for a very long time.”

Thrust into not only starting classes, Wells also had to learn how to grocery shop, cook, and make friends in a place where she knew no one. She contracted COVID-19 in her first month and had to spend time in isolation, which worsened her homesickness. But she pushed through, and in time, grew to enjoy living within walking distance of Battery Park and its views of the Statue of Liberty.

By her second year, Wells said she found she “actually love[d] living in the city.”

Highlights included her college professors, classmates, prayer group, babysitting, and studying at the city’s many coffee shops. She enjoyed King’s unique culture of debate and friendly competition, tutoring her housemates to win a writing contest. It was the only contest the House of Queen Elizabeth won in her time there.

However, the year was fraught with tension as King’s financial woes slowly became public. 

Zoom calls with executives became routine. The interim president, Steven French, said that more money was needed to finish the semester. Students began getting rent notices for their college housing. Yet through May 2023, the school claimed no intention to close.

Then King’s announced no classes would be taught in the 2023-2024 school year. 

Forced to transfer somewhere else, Wells “eventually came around to the idea of Houghton.” Many of Wells’ family members have attended Houghton University.

Wells misses the iced oat milk lattes at Olive’s, her favorite coffee shop; her babysitting job; and her former professors and classmates. But she’s found new people —and drink orders—at Houghton. 

Wells really enjoys chapels. “Hot take, I guess?” she chuckled, acknowledging that many students don’t feel the same way.

And Wells has had a blast at Houghton’s events, including intramural water polo. 

Wells hopes to return to New York City from time to time to visit friends, although she plans to move home to Florida after graduation. There, she wants to teach alongside her high school English teacher. 

Ultimately? She’d like to be Dr. Wells. 

She asks herself, “should you be saying that right now because you’re an undergraduate?” But she still dreams. ★

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Stories In Focus

Rene Stempert

By Anna Catherman ('24)

On July 4, 2024, Rene Stempert will celebrate her 30th year on the job. 

“My first day on the job was a paid holiday, so that was kinda cool,” Stempert said. 

Stempert started off on that day in July 1994 as a custodian in Gillette Hall. Now, she serves as the lead custodian for Sodexo, who promoted her to the role five years ago.

As lead custodian, there is no “typical” day on the job. Stempert does whatever’s at the top of her to-do list. She trains new hires and cleans guest bedrooms down at the Flats and in the President’s House. She is certified in pool maintenance. In the summer, she maintains all the hard floors on campus, scrubbing between tiles. 

Although Stempert’s day-to-day work is primarily keeping campus clean and safe, Stempert views her work not as a chore but as a ministry. 

Serving exclusively in Gillette for decades, Stempert made it her mission to learn the names of every girl in Gillette. Some years, she succeeded. She even knows many pets. Stempert recalls a seeing-eye dog named Brownie was the first service animal to live in Gillette with his owner, Elicia.

Now that Stempert’s work covers most of campus, she hasn’t had as close a connection to Gillette residents. But she gets to meet and train more students – up to 40 each semester, plus 3-6 new staff per year. 

When students skip work or their performance goes down, Stempert has a heart-to-heart with them. Three times this year, she’s used the parable of talents as a reminder to be faithful in the small tasks. At the end of December last year, she saw a student in Paine who looked like he was depressed and struggling, so she stopped and prayed with him. 

Stempert used to struggle a lot with being grumpy and short with people, and explained that she is still working at showing love and kindness. 

Working at Houghton has helped Stempert’s faith grow. The first time she shared her faith journey in 2001 was a major turning point for her. She had accepted Christ a decade prior, after a childhood riddled with sexual abuse, a stint in the Air Force and marrying a man who became verbally and emotionally abusive. There were no sudden revelations for Stempert. 

“I really wish my faith story had started off more intensely because I continued to make a lot of stupid choices in my life,” Stempert confessed. 

But God used moments throughout the years to slowly transform Stempert. Sharing her story was a big one. One that helped her understand what testimony and ministry are. 

Stempert strives to put what she’s learned into action. This year, she felt a strong call to invite people to come to her church. Thanks to her initiative, five First Year students are now attending Belfast Free Methodist. ★

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Letter to the Editor Opinions

Letter to the Editor: Discipleship, not Gender Roles

By Dr. Kristina LaCelle-Peterson

In a culture obsessed with gender differences and gender roles, it’s good to consider how absent these themes are in Scripture. When we look at the Bible, we find the authors virtually unconcerned with how to be a man of God or a woman of God; they consistently invite us simply to be faithful to God. In other words, Scripture pictures us as humans before God, in creation, fall, redemption, as well as in the invitation to participate in God’s work in this world. Biblical writers are apparently uninterested in how a woman develops faithfulness to God as a woman or how a man does it as a man. For followers of Christ, discipleship is discipleship.

But Christians have often read their gender assumptions into the Bible. For instance, some Christians claim that God placed humans in a hierarchy right from the start with men in charge. One reason they think this is their assumption that God is male and therefore men, being more like God, have the responsibility to lead and direct. However, God is not male since God is spirit; God is supremely personal without being limited by the markers that define animal life. In addition, men are not more like God, since Genesis 1 tells us that all humans are made in God’s own image and commissioned together to do God’s work. They are to be fruitful and multiply; they are to have dominion. No one is the boss, while the other follows. No one protects and provides while the other is passive. We see hierarchy introduced only after the Fall, where domination and subjugation are clearly expressions of the brokenness of humanity after sin has entered the system. Hierarchy interrupts the delightful mutuality of God’s design and also seems to suggest that God likes order more than the flourishing of the people involved.  This, of course, is a questionable assumption given God’s deep love for all of us and God’s consistent desire for the just treatment of all.  

Another unhelpful habit in considering God’s design is to suggest that men and women complement each other and need each other to reflect God. Scholars differ in how they interpret the phrase “image of God” (in terms of capacities,  relationality, or function) but generally affirm that all humans are formed in God’s image equally. What it does not say is that men and women together mirror God’s image. In other words, just because male and female are both made in God’s image, it does not follow that the statement can be turned around to mean that it is in our maleness and femaleness that we reflect God. That kind of thinking results in some deeply problematic theological positions.   

First, with regard to people, if the marriage of a man and a woman is thought to most fully represent God that would mean that huge swaths of the human race would be somehow less in God’s image, given that they are single or not in hetereosexual relationships. Being made in God’s image is fundamental to our being, and our marital or relational status cannot affect it in any way. Besides, as the biblical scholar NT Wright has observed, our maleness/femaleness is what we share with the created order, not with God. We are like many of the plant and animal kingdoms where male and female bodies are necessary for reproduction. Though some Christians want to spiritualize these categories, the Bible doesn’t. 

Furthermore, to say men and women most fully display the image of God together, implies that God is a composite of male and female, with men and women each reflecting one ‘side’ of God. It makes God like the yin and yang, the complementary male and female “energies” of Eastern thought, pasted together. This dualism regarding God’s essence is not biblical. God is I AM—being itself, the source of being, the One who simply is. It would be better to say that God, having no body, transcends the categories of male and female, since these things are linked to earthly life and specifically to reproduction. Even talking about ‘masculine’ and ‘feminine’ traits in God is a projection of our ideas of masculinity and femininity onto God. God encompasses all human traits, regardless of whether we have labeled them masculine or feminine.

In the second creation narrative, the animals are paraded before the human and are disqualified on the basis of their inferiority. In contrast, the woman is not inferior but corresponds to him and therefore is someone who can offer an antidote to his aloneness. She is not his little helper, however, since the word ‘help’ here is most often used for God in Scripture, offering the help that the other needs to thrive. Significantly, Adam rejoices, not that God has made someone who is different from him to complement him (or follow his lead or do his dishes), but someone who is bone of my bone. She is my very body, he rhapsodizes, someone who shares my fundamental essence—being human.

When we come to the New Testament, we find Jesus calling women and men to be disciples on the same basis – there is not a different set of expectations for female and male disciples. In fact, when Jesus is asked to endorse gender roles or gender valuation, he refuses to do so.  For instance, he refuses to devalue women as he was expected to in his culture on the basis of their purported sexual danger. Consider the story in Luke 7 where he welcomes the touch of a woman who washes his feet, though the religious folks present can only see her sexual impropriety. And in the story of Mary and Martha (Luke 10) he refuses to press Mary into the expected gender tasks. Instead, he affirms her choice to sit at his feet, learning like only male disciples generally did in that culture. And when a woman cries out in the crowd, “blessed is the womb that bore you,” he says, “Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it!” (Luke 11:27). It is discipleship by which people are valued in Jesus’ kingdom, not following gender expectations. When his family members show up, he asks, “Who are my mother and brothers?” Looking at those around him he continues, “Here are my mother and brothers! Whoever does the will of God is my brother and sister and mother” (Mark 3:33-35). He is not disrespecting his own mother, rather inviting all those around him and by extension all of us, to be part of his family on the basis of obedience. Whatever differences may exist between men and women (and that’s a huge topic that cannot be addressed here) the call for Christians is not to figure out how a woman is to act or how a man is to act, but how each of us lives into the call of Jesus to lay down our lives for the other and to wash each other’s feet. If there are differences presumably they would come out naturally; we don’t have to force the issue.

Paul, too, celebrates women’s (along with men’s) faithfulness to promote the good news, even calling many women his co-laborers in the Gospel—see especially Romans 16. Some, he notes, risked their lives for him and the sake of evangelism. When he lists gifts in 1 Corinthians 12 there is no segregation of gifts on the basis of sex.  

So, if Scripture is not terribly concerned with gender roles and norms, why is the church so caught up in promoting them?  People seem to fall back on them because cultural expectations are comfortable and feel ‘right’ in any given moment in history; it’s just easier to go with the grain.  If we have heard them justified with Bible verses (taken out of context) they even feel Christian, but we have to remember that our ideas of femininity and masculinity are not biblical.  They are products of our culture in this time and place.  For instance, the Bible does not require men to provide and protect the people in his family.  In Scripture, we have plenty of examples of women’s bodies being used to protect men, for better or worse, and the passage most often trotted out to describe the ideal wife (Proverbs 31) depicts a woman providing for her family.  In addition, the texts of Scripture were originally addressed to people primarily in agricultural societies where everyone’s work is necessary; men, women and even children work hard to keep the family economy going.  The man as ‘provider’ seems particularly linked to cash economies and to middle class status; in 19th century America, for instance, having a wife who “stayed home” became a symbol of male success, (that is, masculinity).  But that doesn’t make it Christian and arguably that cannot be a sign of Christian faithfulness, since it would mean that poor, working class families where everyone has to earn money, would be less pleasing to God.  

The Wesleyan tradition has stood for the equality of all people and for each person’s responsibility before God.  When it comes to the community of the redeemed, we stand shoulder to shoulder because we are all sinful humans who have been addressed by the grace and love of God. In Scripture, God is said to give gifts and then invite people to use them for God’s glory, without the question about gender roles entering into the equation.  Simply, don’t bury your talents in the ground!  With regard to marriage, we take seriously the call to “Submit to one another out of reverence to Christ” (Eph 5:21) and believe that it is what we are called to model in our families, in our churches and in the society, rather than cultural ideals of manhood and womanhood.  In fact, all the instructions about how Christians should interact—encouraging one another, putting each other’s needs above our own, bearing each other’s burdens, etc.—apply to both people in a marriage.  When it comes to parenting, then, both partners are to love their children unconditionally, as far as humanly possible, and both are to model for their children what it means to be a follower of Christ and what it means to lay down one’s life for the other.  

Part of the grand adventure of being Christian is living into the full personhood that God created us for. Scripture does not ask us to wedge ourselves into a box of cultural (or church or family) expectations about how a woman should act or how a man should act, but invites us to ask how do I live a life that most fully uses the gifts and passions that God has placed in me? How do I bring my whole self to my relationships and not hide or diminish myself in order to adhere to gender roles or rules? Let’s remember that God doesn’t ask us to tamp down our individuality in order to follow cultural patterns, but invites us to develop our full, unique selves.  Let’s live into the lovely diversity with which God has created us. ★

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Stories In Focus

Feature: Andrew Walton

By Anna Catherman ('24)

Dr. Andrew Walton has been in school for 21 years. During his undergraduate years at Houghton College, he took a gap year to “go be a ski bum in Colorado.” After his freshman year as a politics major, he was adrift. But once he came back, he “never left school again.” He ended up switching his major after falling in love with the Old Testament of the Bible. 

Upon graduation, Walton immediately entered Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary. He toyed with a career in ministry, but ultimately felt led to scholarship. Walton enjoys studying the language and Israelite culture. He went straight from his Master’s program at Gordon-Conwell to Harvard, where he completed his Ph.D. in Hebrew Bible. 

Coming back to Houghton from Harvard was a transition that Walton welcomed. 

“I wanted to be in a college that cared about students,” Walton said. 

Besides teaching Old Testament courses, Walton is also involved in research. The area he’s been focusing on is the idea of challenging God. Last semester, he shared a Faculty Lecture entitled “The Paradox of the Pious Person: When Challenging God is the Most Faithful Course of Action.” He explained that there are many instances in the Old Testament where the Israelites are “talking back to God.” Abraham begs for Sodom and Gomorrah to be spared, David laments in the Psalms and Jacob wrestles with God. It’s a longstanding tradition, and one that comes up frequently in his classes. 

While many Christians view doubts as a major weakness, Walton has a different take on it. He says that ignoring wrestling and doubts is unhealthy for Christians. But at the same time, resisting God in any way is “a delicate and dangerous conversation.” Therein lies the paradox of his work, and one he discusses regularly with students. He reads a lot about it too. 

Walton reads so much that he was recently named the Willard J. Houghton Library’s Faculty Model Reader for 2024. Walton posed with Abraham’s Silence by J. Richard Middleton, one of the many books he’s read on challenging God. It’s the best book he’s read recently, and he doesn’t read much for leisure. 

“I try to read for fun and then I think ‘I have better things to read,’” Walton commented. 

Walton no longer skis. He finds the western New York slopes to be boring compared to the cliffs he used to jump off in Colorado. 

“Mountains are just puny and tiny [here],” Walton claimed. “It just wasn’t the same thing.” 

Now, Walton spends free time watching Houghton’s sporting events and just being with his wife and four children. ★

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Campus News

The Senior Art Show

By Rebecca Dailey ('25)

This Friday, on April 12, the 2024 Senior Art Show will open in the Ortlip Gallery in the Center for the Arts. Thirteen senior art students will be showcasing their work in tonight’s gallery, including, Tamara Edwards (‘24), Aubree Niles (‘24), Hannah Smith (‘24) and Savannah Stitt (‘24). Various art pieces such as paintings, sculptures and photography will be displayed throughout the gallery for viewer appreciation. 

Professor John Rhett is the Senior Art faculty advisor and instructor for Senior seminar and Studio. His main goal is making sure the students exhibit a maturity within the medium of their choice.

“We are creative beings, God is the Heavenly creator,” Professor Rhett stated. “There is a need to create with these gifts gracefully through challenges and be grateful for them.”

A few seniors took time out of their busy schedules to speak about their work and the gallery.

Smith explained her process around her work, “A big part about it is being balanced and coming to your artwork with a peaceful mind and not cluttered with everything you have to do … I like to think of it as forever honing my craft. I am a tinkerer. I like to play with different mediums. I’m not afraid of losing art and not doing it because I’ve been doing it my whole life.”

Niles has been working in art since childhood. It has been her way of expressing herself even when words cannot. 

“Looking back to my work from freshman year,” Niles stated, “I am blown away by the development of quality and sincerity in my work. I started college with little education on art and had this horrible opinion that abstract art wasn’t art … I quickly learned that abstraction (well, good abstraction) is difficult. I am so thankful that I was taught the importance of abstract work. It reveals something true, raw, and honest about the artist. 

Edwards transferred to Houghton in the Fall of 2022. 

“I learned the importance of process,” Edwards explained, “art develops with time and a support group who challenges me in the quest to understand art not as an individual activity. Individual as an artist but built in community and communication.” 

Stitt reflects on her growth as an artist and in life.

“I have learned that a huge part of growing as an artist involves time, and within that time, experience.” Stitt explained that “Some things are only learned through the process of doing something over and over. And other times, I have grown as an artist because I am growing as a person and that informs and influences my art.” Rhett shared his excitement about seeing the students’ work be displayed and the growth they have shown.

“The show is a time of celebration,” Rhett stated. “They’ve been students their entire lives sitting in class and doing assignments. This is their chance to start taking ownership of who they are as artists.” ★

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News

The Moon Campus Closure (April Fools 2024)

By Abigail Bates ('26)

Houghton University’s Moon Campus will be closing on October 1, 3909.

Houghton has officially stated that there were many issues, including the difficulties for students to adapt to the environment of the Moon, territorial disputes with other national and international colleges and universities, and the interplanetary issues involving an organization associated with students of Houghton’s Moon Campus who call themselves the STAR Empire.

The university made an official statement on September 2, 3909 that “The STAR Empire organization is not affiliated with Houghton University, therefore no legal implications of the STAR Empire’s actions can be imposed upon the institution.”

Despite this, Houghton has faced tumultuous protests and public criticism about the actions of the STAR Empire in other planets’ territories, which include, among many, hijacking and destroying supply shipments, refusal to cooperate with android and cyborg officials, and offensive posts on BlaRK against technology providers and users.

Dr. Revekstus Iedoma, a well known historian and visiting professor from O-AI University, who gave the recent lecture “The Age of ChatGPT: Its Effects on Early Society” on Wednesday the 12, said that the “closing of the Moon Campus is a result of the STAR Empire’s Moon Campus hostage situation. There’s no doubt about it.”

During the Moon Campus Hostage Situation on June 5, the STAR Empire took over Houghton’s Moon Campus and held the Moon hostage using Advanced Directed-Energy Weapons (ADEW) stolen from the Hoffman Science Center. Cullen Arndt (‘10), a Houghton student and official spokesperson of the STAR Empire, stated that the hostages and the moon would be released if both the National Council of Earth (NCE) and the Interplanetary Alliance (IA) withdrew their involvement in the interplanetary political crisis caused by the STAR Empire’s actions. Within the day, the situation was settled with the arrest of 27 students and 3 staff who were members of the STAR Empire, and the removal of the ADEWs from the Moon’s orbit. The hostages were rescued with minor injuries.

As the members were led out of the campus, they proclaimed, “Long Live Tim Martian! We are one!”

Tim Martian, founder of the STAR Empire, was a Houghton alumnus of the Class of 3820. He worked for The Houghton STAR for three years before rising to his position as Editor-in-Chief which lasted three months until his forceful removal in the Fall of 3819. 

According to an email (messages distributed by electronic means via a network) sent by the succeeding Editors-in-Chief, Neo Stitt (3820) and Kira Tiedemann (3821), Martian was removed from his position “due to his conflicting interests with the direction of The Houghton STAR, and the negative impacts of his android views on the factually credibility of the paper.”

Alia Welker (3822), an alumna who had worked in the Columns Section under Martian, said that “Tim was terrible to work with. He acted like a dictator … he even abolished our digital paper and wasted our budget on physical [paper] copies!”

When Martian’s removal from his position as the Editor in Chief was officially declared, Welker said he barricaded himself in the STAR Office for three days—without food or water—before he was dragged out. She added that he was clutching onto one of the old relics of the STAR Office, a rolling chair, as the campus security sent him to the emergency room.

“It was that crazed look in his eyes,” Welker stressed. “I just knew he would do something. I knew it right from the beginning.”

Welker reflected that because of her experiences working with Martian, she didn’t feel surprised when she saw his name appear on Galaxies Transmissions.

“Tim had always been a vengeful guy,” Welker explained. “But, you know, I never expected he would’ve created that secret organization right under our noses.”

Martian began the organization back in the 3819-3820 school year, when he was still a student at Houghton University. Although he died in a manual hover car accident only three years after graduating, the members of the STAR Empire continued to pass down his teachings. 

“We reject all malevolent technology!” Ardnt, who’s currently held in the Ceres prison, was reported to have said. “We will destroy all technology as stated in the STARBook.”

Although a copy has never been seen before, organization members claim the STARBook contains the life teachings of Martian and the origins of their mysterious chant, “We are one.”

The NCE has been attempting to locate other members of the STAR Empire since the apprehension of the students and staff after the Moon Campus Hostage Situation, but only a few have been uncovered since the investigation began (including celebrity Abvi Bats). An alert was sent out by the NCE on Galaxies Transmissions about the high likelihood of numerous secret members of the organization within the territories of Earth and other planets. Tensions have begun to rise on BlaRK in response to the possible threat the STAR Empire poses to the treaties between Earth and other planets, with Houghton University and its affiliates receiving the hardest judgements and surveillance. In spite of this, Houghton has maintained its stance on the situation and continues to operate.

“While Houghton University bears no responsibility for the Moon Hostage Crisis, we have no plans to reopen the Moon Campus program and intend to follow all new NCE mandates,” President Joshua Carpenter stated. “However, there are many future programs currently underway that students can look forward to.” ★

Categories
News

A New Humanity (April Fools 2024)

By Joshua Carpenter ('24)

People used to say that the android could never equal that of the human. But no more. 

With the release of the Welker Corporation’s latest series of Homo-replicants—the Deus-9s—the United World Government has granted citizenship to all 9s under the condition that they contribute to the World Relief Effort for the duration of their five-year lifespan. 

As the mastermind behind the Deus code and former alumni of Houghton University, Christian Welker defends his latest creation.

  “Unlike their belligerent predecessors,” Welker says, “the 9s are programmed to love, not hate. They are not the Deus-8 war machines that invaded Zanzibar, or the Deus-7 nuclear reactors that took half of the U.S western coast off the map. 

The Welker Corporation has since apologized for their destructive past, and have devoted their latest series to rebuilding the earth they assisted in destroying during the Corporate Wars of the 3rd millennium—to much success.

Millions of mass produced 9s are employed at various organizations around the world, with the U.S accounting for 34% of 9s in residence; in second place is China with 29%; and then in third Russia with 26%. In the state of New York alone resides the majority of 9s in the U.S, a remarkable 1:1 per capita that sociologists project will double by the end of the next decade as ties between the U.S and the Welker Corporation tighten.

German sociologist Hanz Schneider is known for his relentless criticism of the U.S-Welker relationship. In his notorious essay “The War for Humanity,” he argues for the annihilation of all 9s as their predecessors were annihilated before them, and for The Welker Corporation to dissolve itself and donate its assets to the World Relief Effort.

“[The Deus-9s] are all goblins posing as humans with a soul,” Schneider writes. “Is humanity so careless to ignore its own history, that dark hole we all call the 3rd millennium?”

At first most of the world agreed with Schneider’s criticism, but after homes and schools re-emerged from the rumble of a bygone era, few remembered his words, and even fewer remembered the 3rd millennium. Now 9s are everywhere—in our cities, schools, and, for some of us, even in our own homes. Life is thriving, with scholars and government officials alike crediting the 9s for their service to humanity. ★

Categories
Campus News

Alice by Heart

By Jiana Martin ('26)

On Friday, March 22 at 7:30 p.m. the Lyric Theatre will hold its second of three performances of “Alice by Heart” in the Tysinger Auditorium of the Houghton Academy. The first performance was on March 21 and the final performance will be on Saturday, March 23 at 7:30 p.m. 

“Alice by Heart” is a pop rock and folk musical which opened Off-Broadway in 2019. 

“It’s a very new production,” Professor Amanda Cox, the director of Houghton’s Lyric Theatre, explained. “It’s very unusual and a little experimental.”

Professor Cox enjoys the newness of the musical as it has not been re-done multiple times and has allowed her to add a Christian perspective to the ending, pointing to hope and redemption.

The musical follows Alice Spencer during the Blitz (a German bombing campaign against the the United Kingdom in WWII) in 1941. She is forced to shelter in an underground tube station with a group of young people, including her childhood friend Alfred who is fatally ill with tuberculosis. Alice and Alfred share a love for the book “Alice in Wonderland,” which Alice begins reciting as a way to cope and process the traumatic events happening around her. She imagines the people around her as the different characters from the story, representing the ways she deals with her grief. The Caterpillar represents her avoidance of grief, the Mad Hatter is her anger about Alfred dying and the Jabberwocky is her fear of losing Alfred. 

“We’re inside Alice’s head and experiencing her imagination as she’s working through the stages of grief,” Professor Cox described.  

Senior Lydia Rech plays the feisty, imaginative and hopeful Alice Spencer. 

“It has been such a privilege to bring this bold and determined girl to life and process, alongside her, so many different emotions,” Rech commented. 

Although her life has been quite different from Alice’s, Rech has been able to use her own experiences to help her convey the emotions she wishes to get across. 

“I often think about the fact that I am a senior – that I am ‘growing up’ and preparing to say goodbye to so many wonderful people here at Houghton. Remembering that I am not alone in this journey, like Alice comes to discover in the show, has been really special,” Rech reflected. 

Rech has enjoyed slipping into Alice’s head and the challenges it brings as well as getting to know the Wonderland characters. To help her prepare for her role, she read the original “Alice in Wonderland” book for the first time. It helped her understand the context of the lines her character quotes from the book and why the book means so much to Alice.

Several cast members for this musical were also in Our Town, the Lyric Theater’s Fall 2023 production, so Rech has also enjoyed the opportunity to perform with them again. 

“I’ve enjoyed getting to pick up right where we left off, in a sense, and get to practice sharing some of those deep emotions that we explored in the fall, only, now, in a musical setting,” Rech said. 

Senior Jonathan Hutmire, who plays Alfred, is one of the people Rech has the privilege to perform with again. In Alice’s imagination, Alfred is the White Rabbit who is always in a rush saying he does not have time and needs to go. 

For Hutmire, “the best part of seeing this show come to life is seeing each person really starting to add their own personal touches to each character.”

Because the musical is fairly new, Hutmire was not sure how he felt about it. However, he came to like it as Professor Cox brought her different vision to the story. 

“She has given new levels of depth, meaning, and beauty to this show and has created something absolutely extraordinary,” Hutmire said.

As seniors, Rech and Hutmire look back at their time in the Lyric Theater program with fond memories and admiration. 

“One of the greatest joys I have taken from the experience is just getting to bond with each different cast,” Rech said. “Here at Houghton, we have each other to lean on and figure it out together.” 

Rech has learned the importance of finding her identity in Christ, not in her abilities or performance, and reminding her fellow actors and actresses of the same thing.

“While it’s only my fourth production with Lyric Theater, it never ceases to amaze me how all these intricate details and beautiful moments can come together to create something even better yet,” Hutmire reflected. 

Looking back at her time directing “Alice by Heart,” Professor Cox admires the student’s dedication to their characters and performances. 

“They do such beautiful work and they’re so willing to throw themselves into creating these beautiful characters,” Professor Cox expressed. “[The show] is stretching the cast members to do things they haven’t done before. They are just fantastic and I’m really proud of it.”

Audiences can expect something that is unusual, fascinating, fun, thought provoking and beautiful. The story goes deep, so audiences should be prepared to cry, but also laugh. 

Rech concluded, “Because of Professor Cox, we perform stories that are more than just a fun show, but a show with incredible depth behind them. Which is what Alice by Heart will be!” ★